Monday, September 21, 2009

Movie Review

Check out my latest Wegmans find.
How cute is this baby pineapple?

I wanted to buy this pineapple mostly just 'cause I wanted it on my blog. I also thought it would be funny to also buy a big one and then tell my kids I was magic and could shrink food. I still may do that.

But then I saw where it came from.

And I was too afraid to buy it because I thought it might make me vomit black stuff and turn one of my hands into a giant alien claw. Have you even seen what the government will force you to do in Joh-berg if they find out that you have an alien claw?

This must be the first time in history that Rotten Tomatoes has been so off on its movie ratings. I don't mind a sad movie. A film with lotsa hand held camera work doesn't bother me. I'll sit through movies with bad plots and poor direction. And I really do pride myself on having good taste in movies. I think I've seen all most every genre of film that matters. I can tell you about Fellini, Kurosawa, and Satyajit Ray.

But I simply do not have time in my busy and important life to watch unsympathetic characters, gross aliens, and African thugs duke it out in South Africa. District 9 represents two hours of my life that was wasted. Trust me, it stinks.

Speaking of movies though. One of my absolute favorite favorite things to do is to go to a party where there is a big group of 25-35 year old guys. I casually bring up the topic of good and bad movies. And after people have been talking about it for a few minutes I like to say in a really loud voice, "I THINK THAT BRAVEHEART IS THE WORST MOVIE EVER MADE!" And then I just sit back and watch the fireworks. Seriously, it is hilarious. Ahhhhh, All the pleasure of insulting someone's mother and killing their kitten, but none of the guilt.


6 comments:

MandoRama said...

Why do they love Braveheart so much?? I thought it was just Matt. I only like the end where they stretch him out - a much less-sweaty alternative to Pilates.

Camilla said...

I disagree with your movie review. Although it wasn't my favorite movie of all time, it was very well made. It did make me feel sick at times though.

But I can see why you didn't like it, because you don't watch R movies. At least that's what I hear.

This is Jordan.

Elliot said...

WRONG! I had special K with ba-nana.

District 9 is the best sci-fi movie since E.T.

I think you might have been too grossed out by the fingernails coming off (I’m sorry I didn’t warn you), to appreciate the greatness of the movie.

Like E.T. I think the creators of D9 wanted us to leave questioning what it means to be human.

But if you need a big budget hollywood movie with some big names may I suggest a couple other summer 09 movies: transformers 2 revenge of the fallen, I haven’t seen it myself but it did exhaust a $300 million budget so its pretty much guaranteed to be great, or land of the lost, haven’t seen it either but a screaming will farrell running away from a t-rex I don’t need to check rotten tomatoes to know this one is going to be bril.

District 9 will be nominated for at least 2 oscars, and will win 1. you heard it hear first.

Spencer said...

lets be honest. District 9 sucked. Everyone knows this. Just because a film "pushes you to think" doesn't make it a good movie. Oh blah, blah, humanity, blah, racism, blah, blah apartheid, blah, blah,xenophobia. Every single person in that theater, if they were being honest with themselves,was happy to see that movie end.

The Ravenstahls said...

I think if you told my husband that about Braveheart and followed it up with a little "dances with wolves sucks!" he may actually have a stroke!!
ps. I forgot to tell you but I did make a huge fool of my self in china trying to chase a fat chinese guy down the street in order to take a picture of him in his three wolf/moon shirt... sadly I fell into a gross Beijing puddle and my elusive prey escaped into a cab... sigh!

Angela Baird said...

Ang...I have loved reading through your blog for the last 30 minutes...I feel like we've been on the phone and you've been telling me about everything that's been going on...Love the pineapple, too! So, my only question for you is if you're pregnant...there are no pics, and lots of prego references, however all about other people. Either way, you definitely shouldn't read my blog when it comes to bashing prego posts, because I'm all the bad ones you talk about, pretty sure. Thank goodness it's always temporary, and kids are pretty awesome. Hope everyone is doing well!