Monday, July 20, 2009

Community Service

No offense to Nia and Kelcy (two dear friends who are summer school teachers)
But this really made my day. Lize brought this EXACT note home from school today:

Dear Parents,
This summer all students attending ESY summer school are required to complete a service learning project. This means that we do something special for the community. Our immediate community involves all our students, teachers and staff.

We have decided to do something special for our teachers and administrators. We are asking your child to bring in a bag of treats such as tootsie rolls, kisses, lollipops, or whatever you might choose. Our plan is to have each student put together and deliver goodie bags for the teachers. The name of the service project is "You Deserve a Treat. " We are hoping to start the project next week. We would like to have you send the treats in with your child by Monday so that we can deliver the bags on Wednesday.
Thank you for supporting our Community Service Project. Please call us if you have any questions. We are hoping the teachers will enjoy the surprise.
Ms. P and Ms. K
(signed by the teachers)

I know that there is no need to explain why I thought this was funny, but I'd like to do it anyway.

  • Summer school students are required to do a service project.
  • Teachers get to choose the project.
  • Teachers decide that it would be good service for the kids to bring them in some candy.
  • Since the kids have to bring in candy, the teachers might as well be specific and list their favorite treats.

I know that working during the summer sucks. But THIS IS NOT COMMUNITY SERVICE

I don't know what is going on here, but my guess is that these teachers are assuming that since these kids are dumb enough to need summer school, their parents won't be smart enough to know a ponzi scheme when they see one (I'm not sure if I'm using that phrase correctly, I had to Wiki it, but it sounds cool and Pete's been saying it a lot lately so I'm gonna go for it.)

I am glad that they defined the words "community" and "service" for us. Heaven forbid we help children who live within 20 miles mine. You know the ones who live in a local government run by thugs and are grateful to go to school in condemned buildings? 'Cause I am way too busy to put up with that crap.

You know what I'm gonna do? I am going to fill a bag with bit-o-honey. The worst candy ever. That'll show 'em.

8 comments:

sara said...

That is not service nor does it involve learning and it's borderline on even being a project. Reminds me of the moms who go trick-or-treating with their costumed 3-month-old babies, expecting to fill a pillowcase for their own consumption. This Halloween I'm going to accuse them all of being Ponzi-schemers!

ForteFamily said...

I can't believe that project letter. That is the most ridiculous thing. But I am not surprised really. ESY is such a bogus deal, but I still find myself taking advantage of the break I get from Beren. We just started our second session of ESY today. Wooohoo! How is Eliza doing? Send me a note on FB when you have a free minute.

alexandra said...

Ha! Lame, lame, lame on the part of the teachers. While they're eating the candy, maybe they can give all of the kids toilet bowl brushes and have them give the janitors (Oh, I'm sorry, facilities maintenance crew) a day off as well.

I'd feel sorry for Eliza though if she got the toilet with the failed attempt to flush down a bag of Bit O Honeys.

BTW, I LOVE Bit O Honeys, but ya know, I'm on a diet, so I guess she can take them in to her scheming teachers instead.

Spencer said...

Hey when you guys come to Utah I could use my car cleaned. I think it will be an excellent service learning experience for your children. They will have to provide the shammies.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, feeling obligated to do "service" when it isn't really service.


Cough, Mulch.

alexandra said...

Pete, you should at least attach your name to your "anonymous" comments.

Pete said...

In the words of the immortal Shaggy, "It wasn't me."

The Ravenstahls said...

So funny!
I clearly need to re-structure my lesson plans to be a little more indulgent... could pedicure chairs be considered a good spot for sensory/water play??